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I got a palit 9400GT (see mc2 in my sig). On the older hardware I'd reccommend the linux live install to HDD.
Or if she wants to do other things then Ubuntu + XBMC, I got my mum a linux netbook for her birthday last year and she has only ever had 1 or 2 problems with it which I was able to walk her through fixing..
if you can I'd give the HTPC a static IP and and use port forwarding on her router for port 22. Then you can ssh in and fix things remotely.
MC1 (SD & HD): Asus A8N SLI, AMD x2 4600+, 2GB DDR 400 Cosair, Palit Nvidia 9400GT 1GB (Passive), ARTIC 500W PSU, Lian Li PC-C32B, Samsung 250GB SATA
MC2 (SD&HD): RaspberryPi
MC3 (SD&HD): RaspberryPi
NAS1: HP Prolient Microserver N40L 2Gb Ram, 250Gb OS Disk, 1x2TB HDD ext4, 5.25" to 3.5" disk drive added to ODD Slot for OS disk
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http://ninet.org